What Shamu Taught Me About Life, Love, and Marriage

Lessons for People from Animals and Their Trainers

by Amy Sutherland

Random House, $18

Reviewed by Colleen Smith Armstrong

After spending a year observing an exotic animal training program as research for her latest book, journalist Amy Sutherland realized the same principles that guided human-animal interaction could be used in her own life, on her family and friends.

When she wrote about this discovery for the New York Times, the overwhelming response prompted Sutherland to expand on her experiences. The result is a charming book about how to get along more effectively with our human — and animal — friends.

Sutherland, who has several non-fiction books to her name, writes directly and succinctly with enough anecdotes to give the book a little verve. Her husband is her primary guinea pig, as she learns how to constructively deal with his smelly bicycle clothes left on the floor, constant lead-foot driving, and fits of anger upon losing his wallet.

While it might be shelved under the “Self-Help” section, the most compelling aspect of the book is its glimpse into the animal training world — which uses less “training” and more thoughtful, friendly, and aware interaction than most of the public realizes. Human interactions within the animal kingdom, and this goes for human-on-human contact, is about gentle persuasion, observation, and mindfulness.

Some of Sutherland’s key points are: reward behavior you want and ignore behavior you dislike; any interaction is training — so be aware and try to do it productively; keep your cool; know your species; and take baby steps. Sutherland uses examples in her own life to back up her assertions, reporting success in her marriage and other relationships. As a reader, real-life experimentation of these animal training techniques is amusing, not to mention gratifying — especially on an unsuspecting spouse.

What Sutherland learned by watching animal trainers at work is simple and applicable with a little thought and effort. This book is another step in learning how to interact with one another more peaceably. We’re just another animal in the broad kingdom that inhabits this earth … and we’re not nearly as complicated as we like to think.