As a parent, it’s difficult to watch your daughter hurting when her friend lets her down.  Maybe one day they were inseparable, and the next, for no apparent reason, they weren’t speaking.  The most important thing for you to do in such a situation is to support your child.  Give her suggestions of how to cope, but don’t try to fix things for her.  Here are a few tips that might help:

• Reassure her that it’s common and normal for young people’s friendships to fluctuate frequently.  This also means it’s entirely likely that her friend will come around on her own.

• Suggest that your daughter see if her friend is willing to get together in person to talk about what’s going on.  It’s best to work through these situations in person, rather than on the phone or online.

• Encourage her to make new friends.  Help her find a new activity to try or encourage her to reach out to someone she knows but hasn’t spent much time with.

• Assure her that she deserves wonderful friendships.  Chances are, this friend breakup was more about her friend than about herself.

• If your daughter and her friend attend school together or are on the same sports team, talk to her about how to act.  If they have mutual friends, those friends might feel obliged to take sides.  Encourage her to downplay the breakup and act civilly in public and among mutual friends.

• Tell her she’ll get through this and will feel better soon.  Encourage her to talk to an older sibling or other family members who might have gone through a similar situation.

— Inspired by Dr. Irene Levine’s article Cheering Your Child Up When a Friend Lets Her Down.  Dr. Levine maintains The Friendship Blog, a blog about the nature, meaning, and depth of female friendships.